One of the biggest mistakes you can make in a real estate negotiation is assuming that every counteroffer requires another counteroffer.
I recently represented first-time homebuyers on a home listed at $359,900. We came in aggressively at $330,000 and asked for $8,000 in closing costs. The seller responded at $350,000.
Too Far Apart to Just Trade Numbers
At that point, we were still too far apart for me to start throwing out new numbers. Instead, I acknowledged that their counter was reasonable, explained my buyers' concerns with the home's layout, and kept the conversation going without actually increasing our offer.
That distinction matters. Staying in the conversation isn't the same as conceding ground. My buyers hadn't moved a dollar, but the deal was still very much alive.
The Question You Hear in Every Negotiation
Eventually, the other agent asked the question you hear all the time in negotiations:
"What's the best you can do?"
Rather than answering and negotiating against my own clients, I turned the question around:
"What do you realistically think your seller would do?"
Watch the full exchange: the actual text messages from this negotiation, on this week's episode. Watch on Facebook →
The Seller Countered Themselves
The response? $342,000.
The seller had just moved another $8,000 without my buyers moving a single dollar.
The Lesson
Negotiation isn't always about coming up with the perfect counteroffer. Sometimes it's about saying "no" without actually saying no, keeping the conversation alive, and giving the other side an opportunity to move first.
It's a version of the calibrated-question approach from Chris Voss's Never Split the Difference — answer a pressure question with an open one, and let the other side talk themselves toward a number. Sometimes the best move in a negotiation is knowing when not to make one.
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